


Return to Space Mall

by seeking_melody



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: garrison trio back at it, implied klance, poor Shiro has to carry her things, punk teamwork, space mall woohoo!, sparkly and pink things for Allura
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 02:59:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14323089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seeking_melody/pseuds/seeking_melody
Summary: Prompt from @kgbsprite on tumblr! “Well exCUSE me for not buying your ‘special’ knife holder for you.”





	Return to Space Mall

"Is it that big of a deal?" Hunk asked.

"YES!"

"NO!"

Keith and Lance yelled at the same time.

Lance ran his hand through his hair exasperatedly. "Look, it was already sold out by the time I got there. What am I supposed to do about that?"

"Break into the backroom and find the spares." Keith deadpanned.

Lance glared at him. "Okay first of all, they do not hide extra products in the back from customers, despite your ridiculous conspiracies-" Keith scoffed. "- and second- I'm not going to break into the backroom! We ran into enough trouble with Varkon when we got Kalternecker and we promised to be on best behaviour or risk being banned entirely. Is that what you want? For us to be banned for ten deca-pheebs?"

"They can't ban you if they can't catch you." The word obvious was leaking from his tone.

"And if they catch you, you can always sneak back in later with a disguise."

Pidge stuck a thumbs up at Keith, which he returned with a grateful smile.

"See? There's a simple solution." Keith shot at Lance.

"Ughhhh." Lance hung his head. "If it's so simple why don't you go get it."

"Can't. I'm busy with missions. Speaking of which, I have to go. Same time next movement?"

"I'll be here." Lance sighed dramatically and flopped over the couch.

Hunk and Pidge exchanged a look.

"Do you want some help breaking into space mall, bud?"

"Yes please." Lance slid down until his head was facing the ceiling lights of the Altean castle. "The things I do for that stupid mullet," he grumbled.

"Allura, could you teleport us close to the space mall but not close enough to be detected?" Pidge asked through her newly built voice transmitter. It only worked when the receiver also had one and was within a short radius, but it was better than trying to hunt down someone on the ship or call them over the speaker to talk with them on short notice. The helmets served the same purpose but none of the paladins wanted to wear their helmet all the time.

Allura chattered excitedly back about getting something 'pink and sparkly' while Pidge hummed noises of agreement.

Hunk offered a hand to Lance, which he took, pulling himself up. "Let's find some disguises. Meet back here in fifteen doboshes."

The gang separated to go to their respective rooms. Pidge was the first to return. Her hair was tired in a short bob. She wore a big orange sweater, and a red skirt, paired with orange leggings. It was completed with orange running shoes with no shoelaces and her signature glasses. Hunk was the next to return. He wore a brown shirt with black spots, and a blue ring at the collar, followed by brown pants and brown running shoes, also with no shoelaces. His hair was smoothed back, though there were a few tuffs of hair sticking out at both sides of his head. Pidge spent three doboshes trying to smooth those tuffs down, before Lance arrived.

"Did you get it?" Hunk asked.

"No! What did you put in your hair? It's all greasy and weird."

"Oh, it turns out if you heat up the food goo and add scaltrite-"

The doors slid open to reveal Lance in a black leather jacket, skinny black pants, and blue V shaped sunglasses. He lowered his sunglasses, looking at Pidge and Hunk with a confused expression. "What are you guys wearing?"

"What are you wearing? We're supposed to look inconspicuous, not stick out like a sore thumb." Pidge raised an eyebrow.

"Hey! I was going for outdated, retro musician." He spread his hands out like a rainbow. "The perfect distraction for the ladies while you two sneak in the back."

"We'll pick out your clothes." Pidge deadpanned.

Lance looked to Hunk for support but he just shrugged. "Sorry bud, but you know she's right. We don't need a distraction this time, and even if we did, you look too much like yourself to not get caught."

Lance sighed. "The price of fame is truly burdensome."

Ten more doboshes later, and the trio emerged exhaustedly.

"I can't believe you don't have any normal clothes in your closet." Pidge protested.

"Excuse you, I have amazing clothes that complement my features perfectly. It's not my fault it's lost on you." Lance scoffed.

"What good is that if it gets you caught! Good disguises need to be simple and effective. Not point a sign at you screaming your real name." She shot back.

Lance groaned. "I know. That's why I settled for Hunk's clothes." He adjusted the green shirt and brown pants for the umpteenth time. "No offense bud. It's just that this isn't exactly my style."

"None taken. For what it's worth, you look good in anything." Hunk patted Lance's back.

"Thanks." Lance smiled back.

"Ugh, bromance." Pidge shuddered.

"Awe Pidgeon, you gotta get in on this." Hunk and Lance wrapped their arms around her in a group hug.

The doors slid open again. "What provisions do we need from the space mall this time-"

Shiro paused and stared at them. "Why are you guys dressed like the mystery gang?"

"Scooby Doo! That's why you two were giving me weird nonstalgic vibes!" Lance pointed at the two accusingly.

Shiro ruffled up Lance's hair into a mess. "There, now you look even more like Shaggy." He grinned. "But that doesn't answer my question. Why are you guys dressed like you're going to... Keith?"

"Keith." The trio responded.

Shiro looked like he was in deep thought. "Is this about the employees hiding extra products in the back room?"

"Yes! That crack theory is wrong, right?" Lance asked.

Shiro shrugged. "I never tested that one out."

"Then we're going find out." Hunk grinned.

Lance browsed the knifeholder section, looking very carefully at each product with a very confused expression on his face. The salesalien approached him.

"Would you like any assistance?" It croaked out in a deep, husky voice.

Yes, how did you get your voice like that? The question hung at the tip of Lance's tongue. "Yes, I'm looking for a good knife holder. Something not too big but can hold a few good decent knives." He declared.

"I've set the tapes in Varkon's surveillance room to loop for seven doboshes. Keep the employees distracted until then. Make sure no one enters the back room." Pidge said through the voice transmitter hidden in Lance's ear.

While the salesalien pulled out different products and described the advantages of each product in its four arms, Pidge and Hunk snuck into the backroom behind him.

Lance nodded, looking very serious.

Two female employees approached the back room, talking animatedly with each other about the seasonal fashion show.

"Ladies!" Lance yelled, interupting the salesalien. He rushed to stand between them and the back room.

"Would you mind introducing me to the wonderful features of these kniveholders." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

The two ladies looked at him with fear and disgust before quickly replacing it with a mask of calm, modest friendliness. 

Ouch. Lance thought. He didn't want to creep them out but desperate times called for desperate measures. Like hell he was going to let Keith think he's right.

He began gathering a crowd of employees. It started out with explaining the knife holder features, but somehow turned into Lance telling an extravagant tale about him travelling the solar system with his trusty knives, breaking into Zarkon's labour camps and freeing prisoners. He told tales about his knive holders and how they were critical for his knives, but he went through them like chips in a bag, endangering his knives as they no longer had a charging station, and in turn endangering himself and many prisoners.

The employees listened rabidly, engrossed in the highlight of their boring day. Lance had just finished describing one particular adventure with the Unilu on swap moon 34AZD2 when Pidge and Hunk snuck out of the back room and dashed to checkout. Pidge had the red box with Keith's desired knife holder in hand.

"Well that's it for me. I'll see all you lovely people later!" Lance seperated himself from the crowd.

"Wait! What about your knifeholder! You need to pick out the best possible one to continue your journey and free more prisoners!" The first salesalien called out.

Lance froze. Crap.

"Well, I don't see anything suitable here today so maybe another time then!"

The salesalien quickly scribbled something down on a note and shoved it into Lance's hand. "Please, contact me before coming. We'll find the best possible fit for you, brave adventurer."

"Uh, thanks." Lance said before running off to join his friends.

"How did you find one?" Lance hissed. "Is there actually a secret stash back there? This is a freaking game changer- I could go to any store and access-"

"Not exactly." Pidge cut him off.

"It wasn't so much a hidden stash as it probably fell and got crammed in with other products." Hunk finished.

"So I am right!" Lance fistpumped. "Keith'll have to eat his-"

"Not exactly, bud." Hunk cut him off.

"We didn't find proof that the stash exists, but we didn't find proof against its existence either. It's huge back there." Pidge said. "I wouldn't be surprised if there are corpses of lost customers or employees hiding somewhere between overstocked beaters and unsold film posters. We've barely scratched the surface."

"So we'll have to investigate more then."

"Yeah, but first let's get this to our favourite emo." Pidge passed the item to the employee. "You're paying, right?"

"Yep. That's me. The wallet." Lance tapped the card and picked up the bag.

Outside the store, they spotted Shiro carrying multiple bags. At least three of them were overflowing with something pink and sparkly.

"So do we help him or-" Hunk asked but Pidge and Lance already began running away before Shiro or Allura noticed them.

"Run away it is." He followed after them.

A figure wearing a black cap, a leature jacket over a garnet shirt, and black jeans followed after the trio.

"Well, at least Keith will be happy-" Lance yelped when the figure placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Who-" He spun around and found himself face to face with the very guy he was talking about.

"Keith!?"

Keith put a finger to his lips and pulled Lance off to the side, into a quiet hallway with a door only open to employees at the end.

"Do we follow or...?" Pidge asked.

"Nah, let's go check out the food court." They walked away.

"I thought you were on a mission. What are you doing here?" Lance said in a soft tone.

"I had some time..." Keith's eyes wandered to the bag.

"You came to try to prove me wrong, didn't you." Lance passed the bag over to Keith.

"You tried the same thing." Keith opened the box and pulled out the foam padding. "So, am I wrong?" He smirked.

Lance narrowed his eyes. "No. But you're not right either. Apparently the back room is 'huge' and we didn't have enough time to investigate it fully."

"Is that so. We'll have to find out some other time then. Can't risk losing this to those cover-ups." Keith noticed the scrap of paper in Lance's hand. "What's that?"

"Some contact information I think." Lance stretched the crumbled piece of paper. "It looks like an alien phone number."

"Figures you'd get a girl's number while you're supposed to be undercover." Keith scoffed.

"Okay first of all, I wasn't flirting, I was just distracting the employees with tales of my grandeur-" Keith rolled his eyes. "-and the guy gave me his number in case I decided to come back. It's not like I'm going to call a guy I met while undercover- that ruins the whole purpose of the disguise."

Keith held his hand out and Lance gave him the piece of paper, which he proceeded to rip into little pieces.

"You won't need that then. Have you eaten lunch yet?"

"Nope. Proving you wrong came first."

"Let's grab lunch. It's on me."

"What about your strict nutrient chart?"

Keith made a face at that. "It won't kill me to eat what I want for one meal." He put the box back in its bag and walked out of the hallway with Lance.

"Why are you dressed like Shaggy?"

"It wasn't my choice! Hunk and Pidge said I stood out too much with my clothes so they made me wear Hunk's."

"So it was Pidge's idea to dress you like Shaggy for the mystery gang look."

Lance stopped. "So that was her plan! That devious, short vixen..."

Keith laughed. "How's the team been?"

"Same old. I think Shiro's somewhere around here, carrying who knows how many shopping bags for Allura right now. We gotta avoid them or we'll end up like him." Lance shuddered and Keith chuckled.

"How have you been?" Lance asked.

"Same old. Missions. Training. Sleep. Eat." Keith almost said death, but held back just in time.

"I see. I see..." Lance trailed off, frowning at something in the distance. "What is Hunk doing?"

Keith followed his line of sight and found Hunk waving his hands in protest against a Galra fast food owner in front of Vrepit Sal's.

"Isn't that the guy who tried to kidnap Hunk as cook for life?"

Hunk grabbed Pidge and bolted towards Lance and Keith.

"Don't ask questions- just run!" Hunk shouted.

Lance and Keith took off after Hunk. "Shiro?" Lance tapped his voice transmitter. "We need to leave the space mall- now!"

"What-"

"Don't have time for questions- just do it!" Lance shouted.

The gang laughed as they slid down the railing of the escalator.

"Zoinks!" Lance yelled for good measure as they skirted around Varkon and escaped the mall.


End file.
